I came across an article the other day by Kovie Biakolo, along the lines of the power of friendship and parts of it clang true in my mind. I mean, can your friends make or break your business?
Now there are many catchphrases and quotes about choosing your friends wisely, that we are the some of the closest five people we know or as Steve Harvey puts its;
“If nine of your friends are broke, you’re going to be the tenth one… If seven of your friends smoke you’re going to be number eight… You’ve got to surround yourself with like-minded people”.
Simply put like looks for like or mirrors like.
What’s your friendship reflection like?
Friendship Reflection 1#
You are childhood friends: So your friends have been with you since the beginning, for as long as you can remember, they know all your first moments, your first crush, your first job and maybe they were there for you the first time you got let go and they were there in the trenches with you even when you decided to start your business when you were still all talk.
Friendship Reflection 2#
You met at uni: You bonded over drinking games, late night study and the fact that they just accepted you as you were meant the you were going to be friends for ever, even if you weren’t quite a full size grown up yet.
Friendship Reflection 3#
You met at work: You bonded over weekends that were too short, doing the 9-5 at the J.O.B and gossiping over lunch.
Friendship Reflection 4#
You have a Bitza group i.e. your main group of friends that you spend the most time with are made up of ‘bits a’ this group, and ‘bits a’ that.
How are things now that you taking steps to start your business or have started your business?
Were they really supportive and encouraging while you were just all talk?
Has the dynamic changed?
Unless you were already hanging out with business owners and entrepreneurs you may start to feel like a square peg in a round hole. Those shared or similar lifestyles and aspirations aren’t so shared any more.
It could be paranoia but you could have sworn that you saw a funny look on their faces somewhere between confusion, panic, pity and genuine pride that you were going after your dreams. If your’e confused about where your friendship stands, maybe so are they!
So what are our options, we have a few.
One: You can ditch those old friends, and not look back after all you are on a fabulous journey of growth, learning and enterprise (with neck roll), “If they don’t get it, then it’s time to move on”.
Two: You can cling on to those friendships so tightly that you smother them and you realise one day that your phone has stopped ringing with invites for drinks but Facebook is still showing you their feed of photos of nights out without you.
Three: Still spend time with your old friends but maybe less often, after all you still enjoy each other’s company, but you might not be able to vomit your business talk all over them.
Four: Create or join a group that you can talk to about business, one that’s separate from old friends. Those you can really talk to about business stuff, who understand where you are coming from, who are in your corner and share your head space and can offer you support advice that will help you build your business?
So just like with our businesses we have to step out in faith and do what we thing is right for us.
The choice is yours! but if you’re asking options three and four seem like a good combo.
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